Tuesday, March 25, 2008

DisConnected

I feel disconnected from everything and everyone right now. It's quite a strange feeling. I am working so much that I feel like I am less than mediocre at everything else right now. I know my kids are missing me. We had a very busy weekend-with no "bum out time". When I dropped my son off at church-he cried like a lunatic. He never does that. He cried like a mad man at school today too. The worst feeling is when I am going to work and he looks at me and says.."Don't go Mama.". or "I wanna go with you Mama.". I feel disconnected from my home and my house work because I am either too busy, or too tired to do it. I take pride in keeping my home nice, neat, clean and organized, and I want to set that example for my children so it spills into their adult life. I am not "up to par" right now. Not my par anyway. I feel disconnected from my extended family, because I haven't had much "phone time". It's time to reconnect. Once I get off of work on Friday afternoon, I will be OFF until Monday morning, and I have NO PLANS. I intend to keep it that way. I am going to stay in my pajama pants for as long as I possibly can. I'm going to play with my kids. I'm going to cook our favorite meals for 3 nights straight. I'm going to clean when my son is sleeping. I'm going to sing into my hair brush with Amber. I'm going to talk to my mutha for an hour on the phone. I am going to play with Alex's race track with him, and go work out with Amber because she loves when we do that. Can I admit that I took Amber to the movies to spend some one on one time with her last week and I was so exhausted that I was a human bobble head in the movie theater? That's awful. It's time to slow down...and reconnect. Fo'Sho'.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

We all feel this way at times. I am in the throws of this myself right now. We are leaving on a 10 day vacation to visit my life long friend in Florida and then onto Disney World and I have so, so many projects at work to finish before - and to top it off my boss will be out the week before me so it is really crunch time.

You know it is bad when you get home at the normal time of 4 and your 8 year old looks at you and says "Mom what are you doing home already...."

And yes my sister Colleen has been disconnected from our extended family - between today and yesterday Colleen and I tried to reach each other and connected successfully for only 15 minutes - and that was after oh about 8 times of phone tag.

We are very, very close and we do not disconnect for days very often. I miss her!!! Maybe I can persuade her to fit me, Joe and the kids in at some point this weekend.

Anonymous said...

I hear ya!!!! catch an e-saver one of these days!!!!!!
love from NY, Dawne