Monday, October 26, 2009

What Marriage Means to me.

Me and Colly have been married for a whole 6 months now. Its been quite a journey for me so far and its about to get even more interesting with another new family member on the way. Colly asked me to be her guest blogger and I said sure even though I really didn't want to. ( File that under the sacrifice and devotion section of marriage. ) Not that good at this whole blogging thing but I love my wife so if it's important to her for me to blog then I blog. Come to think about it...There's not much I don't do when she asks me to do it, whatever It may be. ( Note: Might take 2 hours to 2 days to get it done but it gets done. ) So here it goes. ( Note: Colly asked me to blog 2 days ago.)

What I've learned!

I thought a Honey Dew was a type of fruit that grew on a vine like a watermelon.................Nope, sorry guys. Turns out a Honey Dew is really a Honey Do and its a list that grows on a piece of paper and it keeps growing year around no matter how many times you harvest. Imagine that.

I've learned that there's more to breakfast and dinner than cereal and turkey sandwiches........I've also learned how to eat at the dinning room table instead of eating over the kitchen sink. ( Note: Saved me from cleaning the kitchen table. )

No more drinking out of the container. ( Note: Again, saves me from washing a glass out. )( Note 2: Nana will kill me! )

I've learned how to gain weight gracefully. (Note: My wife being pregnant is no excuse.)

All joking aside. Its not just me anymore. I've been given a gift from God to be a husband and a father. To lead my family in the best way I know how and in a way that would make God and my wife proud. I had to let go of those things that I held onto as a child for I am a child no more, I am a man and God has called me to be more than what I was before I was married. I said my vows and made a promise before God to love my wife from now until forever, in sickness and in health till death do us part and that's what I'll do.

I've been blessed with a wonderful, understanding, patient, loving wife and 3 1/2 awesome kids. ( Note: That half will soon make 4. ) It's been 6 months since we said our vows but it feels like it was yesterday. I've only known Colleen for 2 yrs but I feel like I've known her my whole life. We have a very loving marriage and I couldn't ask for anything more.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009


I'm not married very long, but have learned a lot about marriage thus far. With plenty still to learn, I am excited for the future. I've learned a lot about marriage as an outsider, being that I am surrounded by many happily married, seasoned couples, but it's different when you experience it for yourself.

I've learned that:

Even a single mother can be selfish in her routine with her and her kids. It's no longer just us, and I call all the shots. That's not a bad thing, it's a good thing, but an adjustment just the same.

If I didn't have God in my life, and the desire to be a Godly wife and live a life that pleases Him, I probably wouldn't be half the wife I am.

Even if something is not important to me, if it's important to my husband, it's important to me.

I have to let my husband make decisions for our family, even if I don't necessarily agree, and stand by him and allow him to learn through his success, or his failure.

I have to love my spouse for who his is, not what he does for me.

There is no 'keeping score' in marriage.

Caring for my husband is a privilege, not a job.

I need to communicate my needs humbly, as needs, not as demanding 'expectations'.

Part of being a good wife is taking pride in taking care of our home, our children, and my husband, even when I'm too tired or I 'just don't feel like it'.

When I have my moments where my thoughts aren't exactly 'Christ centered', I just think about my wedding vows, and the calling God has placed on me. He's given me the opportunity to be a wife, something I had kind of given up on. I don't want to disrespect that ever.

My next post will be written by my husband, and his views on marriage thus far. Should be interesting!

Sunday, October 18, 2009


I don't care what year it is, I am going to make sure my son has proper manners. I already use the phrase 'ladies first' as often as possible. I'm trying to teach him to hold doors and let the ladies go first too. A little manners go a long way.

2 times this week I ate at work standing up while men sat in the available chairs, and not one of them offered me their seat. I'm sorry, but pregnant or not, if your a man, and your sitting down, and there is a woman standing up with no seat, GET UP. Offer at the very least. Who doesn't teach their boys these things? Won't they want this for their daughters one day if they have any?

My husband has these manners. If I come in the door with bags, he runs over to grab them out of my hands, and then goes and gets the rest. He opens doors, car doors, he was brought up with old school manners. THANK GOD FOR THAT.

I'm done.

Thursday, October 8, 2009

It's HERE.

Venus Music & Arts Festival. A dream of my husbands for about 15 years. I haven't said much about it, because frankly, up until the very last minute, we weren't sure if we were going to be able to pull it off. We started with a big zero dollars, and wound up raising close to $30,000 in sponsorship. That alone warmed my husbands heart that people believe in what he was trying to accomplish. Robert and his associate have been working endlessly on the festival for the past 6 months. It is a 3 day festival of Music, Art, dance, food, and much much more. DJ's are coming from Israel, Chicago, California, Washington, Maryland, Tennessee, Georgia, Colorado, and all over the Carolinas. There is:

A full camp ground with a camp site competition.
A Fire Artist Competition
A Pro Graffiti Team Exhibition
The Venus Art Market (Art exhibition, Glass Blowing, Metal Workers, Painters, Sketchers, and Costume designers.)
With These Hands Mix Academy(teaching how to mix music)
The History of Electronic Dance Music which features over 70 of the top artists of our time.

Visuals by Peter Parker (

Dancers by Archedream

This festival is going to be amazing. We are so excited. I am headed there right after school tomorrow, and will stay there until sometime Sunday night. My husband was kind enough to book me a hotel. I'm definitely not feeling like camping at this stage in the pregnancy game. I'm working the door Friday night. The rest of the weekend, I plan to soak in Robert's success, and watch the look on his face as the people keep pouring in. I've been praying for provision, and now I'm praying for the people, and the weather. I hope to post photos of a very full festival come Monday. Enjoy your weekend.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Getting by, with a little help, from your friends

I have a friend. Their life has been shaken quite a bit over the past year or so. A broken, extremely short marriage, getting back on their feet, no family here, trying to heal and still stay afloat. Not the over emotional expressive type, but will still let things out in their own way.

4 weeks ago, that friend asked me if I was going to church that Sunday. My answer of course was yes. I go every Sunday, it's my favorite part of my week. 11:30 service works best for them. I never go to 11:30 service. I'm an 8:30 attender. No matter-11:30 it was.

I meet them in the lobby, we attend church together, and then we go our separate ways. I discuss sermons with them on their terms, when they are ready. I wasn't sure exactly how God was working in them, but he was doing enough for them to come back each week since. This makes me so happy. This is an instance where, even though it's only one person, I am the church. Then it came. The sentence that made switching service times and not pushing, but being consistent all worth while.

'I want to thank you for being there for me. I really appreciate you. I lost a lot of faith with all that I have been through, and I am learning a lot by coming to church with you, and it makes me feel good.'

YES!!! Any other takers? It's just that simple. Your whole life can change. It will change. Just like mine did. Not over night, but I promise you it will.

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Family Updates

Me: My belly has popped. 'nuff said.

My husband: I know he's very handsome with bright blue eyes and sandy blond hair, but between working the past 3 nights, and coming up on fulfilling one of his biggest dreams next weekend, I haven't been able to spend much quality time with him. But we both can't wait.

My big son Taylor: Well....I heard him get a stern speech about his mid term grades on the phone today. I also heard the conversation end like this: "Hey, I love you. You hear me? Just because I'm getting on you about your grades doesn't mean I don't love you buddy. You can do better, your better than that."

Amber: You are looking at a mid term A/B honor roll student!! She is so happy and proud, and so are we! And by the way, she has an 'A' in band so far. That's my girl. She's so awesome.

Alex: I think this picture pretty much sums it up. This is my life with my son. In addition to this, he speeds around on a radio flyer bike in the house cutting corners and creating speed bumps with my resistance bands. Hey, at least someone is using them.

I hope your family is doing well!