Thursday, December 10, 2009

I Once Knew This Girl

She had a baby boy in December 2005. It was such a bittersweet time in her life, because although it would be 7 months before she left, she already knew her relationship was over.
I would say during pregnancy, she started to get depressed. She's not sure if she honestly believes in postpartum depression, but whatever it was bad. She didn't get to enjoy her son as an infant. She took care of him, but it wasn't the same as the last time. One day when he was just about 2 weeks old, she left him in the car at Walmart, while shopping for baby supplies. It was only about 3 minutes, but felt like a lifetime for her. He was snug, sleeping in his car seat. She still holds that memory fresh in her head. The frustration of the constant tears and lethargic ways started to fill the house. She had Christmas that year, and although the house looked like something out of a magazine, it was empty, relatively speaking. She was empty.

June of 2006, it's time for a change. Having to let go of having a family was one of the hardest things she has ever had to do. Here she is, 32, and in a bedroom at her sisters house with a 7 month old, and an 8 year old, feeling like a failure. The depression got worse. The family stepped in, and off to therapy she went. Once a week, for a while, compliments of her mother. In the meantime, a door opened. An old boss from where she grew up gave her an opportunity to work from home. It was a new venture for the company, with no guarantees. But it enabled her to get on her feet. That was a gift from God, he wanted to take care of her, she just didn't know it yet.

She moves in to a beautiful 3 bedroom apartment in a great area, and got to stay home with her son, be a room mother for her daughter, and slowly get her life back together. The job only lasted 4 months, but it was just long enough for her to get it together. Something was still missing. She was still making bad decisions and repeating sin patterns, even though things were looking up. Therapy was helping a lot, but the real change came when she decided to let the most important person in her life. God.

She started going to church, and slowly but surely, her whole life transformed. Shawn Wood. Confessions of a Pastor. That's where it all started. That was in I believe June or July of 2007. If she knew all it would take to learn how to love herself was to get to know God, she would have done it a long time ago. That girl I once knew began to die that day, and a new woman emerged. That same girl who thought it was her destiny to raise her kids and be single for the rest of her life is now in a loving marriage with a respectful, kind, Godly man. She is raising her family the right way, setting a great example, and is even expecting a baby in just a few months. God has showered her with blessings since the day she stepped out, and began to trust in Him. She stepped out, and He stepped in, and her life has never been the same.


Marie Marsicano said...

Speechless with a face full of tears!!!

You were always stronger than you gave yourself credit for. The path you walked was so you would be where you are today - rough for sure - but worth it.


Jim, Heather, Jordan and Madison said...

I love your story for so many reasons, most of which you already know. You are an amazing woman, and it isn't hard for us to see how "things happen for a reason", God was seasoning you up for the perfect moment to pounce on your life and change it forever! What an example of strength you are and will be to your children and others like mine. I love you!

dawn said...

i love this post! brought a smile to my face, tears to my eyes and joy to my heart! amazing how God can change one girl's life!

La Familia Garcia said...

This is beautiful! In so many ways, I can relate. Thanks for sharing!

Lisa said...

The old is gone and the new is here. The Lord is so good and faithful. I love hearing your story even though it was hard for you to go through God is using it to bless you and those around you. Thanks for sharing.