Christmas Time

I took a bunch of pictures of our tree, but photos never do a Christmas Tree any justice.

Anyway.....it was the night before Thanksgiving. Robert and I were having a 'date' night....we were relaxed, lovin' life, and we went for our tree. It was a beautiful night, and when you are out there with all of those beautiful trees....you seem to forget where you live, and how much space you have. We brought home this monster. Once we got it in the house, we were like...what are we going to do with it? We have the height, but not the width-not with ease anyway. We put a couch in Amber's room, shuffled things around a bit, and found a home for this huge, beautiful tree. We love it!


This is real too. Robert decorated it, it came plain, and was just as beautiful with nothing on it.

We are packed out in the space that we have!

Gotta have the misfits, Santa, and Rudolph! These have been Amber's since she was small. They graduated from her room to the living room this year. I guess she has out grown them.

I'm not sure if you can really tell how big it is. Like I said, pictures of Christmas Trees just don't cut it.

Lit up!

Belly shot! Well, my Mom is holding it, but you get the picture!

The story behind Tink:

Every year, my Mom buys ornaments for the kids. I think it varies who gets them, depending on what she finds. She is very particular, and puts a lot of thought into it. They are themed based on the child...very awesome and thoughtful. Amber got this Tink about 4 years ago.

And the year after that.

And the year after that.

And the year after that.

For whatever reason, this poor ornament is the one to 'take one for the team every year'. Her bell is green glass, and it's very delicate. This ornament was $10. It has now cost my mother $40 in 4 years. She really wants Amber to have it, and it's really so beautiful. I wish you could see it better. She said she won't buy it again. I doubt that, but I hope she doesn't have to.

My man. I do love him. He's a pain in the butt, but I love him.

2 Jobs, 2 Kids, and One on the Way?

I have been asked countless times how I do it all. I think secretly, it's 'how do you do it at your age'. At least for some people anyway. I thought I should put it in perspective.

Age is just a number. It's a state of mind. I never think....how can I do this all at almost 36 years old. I don't use it as a crutch either.

I feel great. Other than the extra weight, things are going amazing. I'm not sick, I'm tired sometimes more than others, but other than that, I just feel...well....porky.

I do work 2 jobs, however, the 2 jobs add up to between 30-40 hours a week. So it's not like I'm working 60 hours a week.

I do what I do for strategic reasons. I do not want to work a 9-5 because I have small kids. Been there, done that, and I didn't like it. With these 2 jobs, I drive and pick my daughter up from school. I go to and from school with my son, and see him in the halls throughout the day. I work both jobs on the same days, so I have 3 days a week off from both jobs. 2 of those days are during the week-open for doctors appointments, parent/teacher conferences...etc. The days I work at night, are the days the kids go to their dads house, so it doesn't take away from my time with them. I have a 3 hour break in between to rest, eat, see my husband....etc.

Job #2 is flexible. If I'm tired or I don't feel well, it takes about 5 minutes and a few phone calls, and I don't have to go. This is like a golden ticket for me.

Job #1 has a sub list a mile long, so the same goes for that job as well. What better place to work than with preschoolers through the holidays?

I have a very helpful husband that cooks, cleans, does laundry, takes care of the dog, and encourages me to stay home at night if need be. (especially if he is home)

I am still very active with my kids, and hope to be all the way through.

Will I stop eventually? Just to stop? Probably not. I worked until the day before I gave birth with Amber. I felt great. I was a stay at home mother with Alex, and felt worse with him than I did with her. Sciatica. Worst. Thing. Ever. Work does me good. I'm meant to do it. It's in the blood.

So to answer the question-I'M A CHAMP! I CAN DO IT ALL! I'm not a sit around kinda girl! Unless, of course, that's what the doctor orders.

Boys Will Be Boys

This is how my boys spend most of their time. I watch, and cringe, hoping that no one gets hurt. A typical night in our house......

A Day in the Life

Up at 6:30.
Make lunches, get dressed, out the door
Car Pool
Off to Job #1
Made corn muffins with 11 little germy critters 'helping'. No I did not eat them
Rainy day=no playground=inside for 4 hours with 11 2 year olds=HOLY MOLY
Home
Car Pool
Job #2
Cheap people need to hit the drive through
Feeling ambitious
Hit Super Walmart
Blow out on the way
made it in to the parking lot
road side assistance (finally getting some money's worth)
Husband comes to the rescue
Shopped while I waited
Just got home
12:42am


And a partridge in a freakin' pear tree.

I wonder what tomorrow will bring.....

Dig

Most peoples wedding songs are lovey dovey happy tunes. Not ours. We went a different route. It's real, it's rockin', and it reminds us of when we were getting to know each other, and finding out what we had in common. Incubus being one of many. Turn on your speakers, or just read the lyrics. Awesome song. No doubt about it.

We all have a weakness
Some of ours are easy to identify
Look me in the eye

And ask for forgiveness
We'll make a pact to never speak that word again
Yes, you are my friend

We all have something that digs at us
At least we dig each other

So when weakness turns my ego up
I know you'll count on the me from yesterday

If I turn in to another
Dig me up from under what is covering
The better part of me

Sing this song
Remind me that we'll always have each other
When everything else is gone

We all have a sickness
That cleverly attaches and multiplies
No matter how we try

We all have someone that digs at us
At least we dig each other

So when sickness turns my ego up
I know you'll act as a clever medicine

If I turn in to another
Dig me up from under what is covering
The better part of me

Sing this song
Remind me that we always have each other
When everything else is gone

I CAN do better

I moved in my current home 3+ years ago. I am embarrassed to admit that in that time, I never emptied out all of my kitchen cabinets, and wiped them down and organized them. They weren't disgraceful, but they weren't exactly neat and orderly. In my defense, I had a lot more important things to do over the past 3 years. Adjust to becoming a single mother to a less than 1 year old and an 8 year old, come to know God, heal, work on me, meet a man, get married, get pregnant....I mean....I've been pretty busy with MUCH more important stuff than this. But did you ever have something that eats at your nerves every single time you look at it? It was time. Today was the day. I emptied every single cabinet and drawer, wiped them all out, and re-arranged them. It took forever, but it's done. I get bonus point too for doing the junk drawer.



I just bought the spice racks, so you could imagine what this cabinet looked like, and how hard it was to find something.
This is my smaller pantry. I have 2 others. All looking similar to this now. Pretty refreshing.

This was a mess. I don't know if under your sink always looks like this, but mine did not.

This will be the biggest challenge, the messiest cabinet in the kitchen. The Tupperware cabinet. I'm going to do my best, but I won't make any promises.

This may be my favorite thing that I did today. I transferred all of my recipes in to this book that I got for my bridal shower. This is something that I have wanted to do for my kids, so they have it, when I'm long gone. Then they can cook all of the meals that they loved that I made for them growing up. Amber will throw out the shepherd's pie recipe, for sure.

I have to accept.....

That my baby girl is not a baby anymore.

That I am no longer the center of her universe.

That she's not a morning person, and me trying to have amazing conversation on the way to school is better known as 'unrealistic expectations'.

That she's going through a lot of changes physically and emotionally, and I have to learn how to deal with her ups and downs, and leave her be.

That she isn't going to want to kiss and hug and hold hands with me as much as she used to.

That I can't take everything so personal when it comes to her. It's not about me necessarily.

That a middle school 11 1/2 year old, and a pregnant woman are a lethal combination.

That I have to stop crying when I feel rejected by her, because this will all come full circle, and she will be back to thinking I'm awesome one day.

That I have raised her well with a good, keen head on her shoulders, common sense, and I have taught her the ways of the world. This will carry on through her everyday life, whether I'm present or not.

That I know she acts right when she is out and about, and treats people with respect, and learn how to trust it.

That I am not losing my baby, but I am gaining a young lady.

Bella May Rose Gebhardt

Do you like that name for a baby GIRL?

Yes, we are having a little, healthy, beautiful baby girl. Let me break her name down for you.

From the start of this pregnancy, my husband has wanted to name a baby girl after his grandmother. Her name was May Belle. 2 separate words that over the years, became one. Everyone called her Maybelle. So we flipped it. Bella May it is. Robert got his wish, and I got a little Italian twist on it, since the word 'Bella' means 'Beautiful' in Italian. A little southern, a little Italian, but beautiful just the same.

Rose is my mother. This will be her tenth grandchild. I wanted to honor her by giving the baby her name. This WILL be her last grandchild. (we said that 3 babies ago, but this time, it's for real.)

We will call her Bella. Unless she's in trouble, of course.

My husband threw his hands up in victory in the sonogram room in front of the technician. We knew we were having a girl since the day we found out we were having a baby. They really check the baby extensively when you are over 35. Kind of freaked me out. Genetic counseling and everything. The doctor said, and I quote, "Consider yourself 22 and pregnant." That's how great everything looks. We are so blessed.

Strangest Halloween Goody

Alex went trick-or-treating with his Dad during the day on Halloween. Apparently neither one of us knew there is a 6pm-8pm rule in the south. So I think my son may have caught someone off guard. This is what was in his bag when he got home. HILARIOUS! I think this poor woman looked at my sons cute face and went in her pantry, and this is what she came out with. The bottom of the bag was full of crumbs too. They went in the garbage-of course. But we all got a good laugh.

Oh What A Night

I've been told that a little boy rarely makes it to his 5th birthday without visiting the emergency room, apparently 3.11 years old was Alex's lucky number. Around 3 o'clock we went for a bike ride. He rides, I walk. I'm not a big fan of bicycles. I think they are dangerous. Go figure.

He likes to ride down the hills on the sidewalk where we live. 1 time-great! 2nd time-awesome! 3rd time, it all went down hill. No pun intended. He went off the side walk in to a gully type thing where they have drainage for heavy rain and it's landscaped so beautifully with ROCKS. Big ones. pointy ones. When I went to pick up my screaming son that was face down in a pool of blood I didn't know what to expect. A broken nose? A busted grill? A poked out eye? As scary as picking up your son and seeing a hole in his forehead and literally staring at his skull sounds, I was instantly relieved that is was that, and none of the above. I picked him up, abandoned his bicycle, and starting running with him...up hill. 32 pound kid, 17 extra pounds. Picture my fat self by the time I got half way home. I thought I was going to have a heart attack. I had to have him walk the rest of the way home. Throw the front door open, and screamed "EMERGENCY". Woke my husband out of a dead sleep (worked 12 last night, working 12 tonight). He took Alex and cleaned him up and bandaged him, told me he needed stitches, and sent me to the hospital while he went to pick up Amber from school. I have to admit that I strategically made sure big Alex didn't come to the hospital. I didn't want him to see Alex before he got sewn up. Calmness is not his strong suit. He hates to see his kids get hurt. I brought him straight to him afterward. I watched them stick a needle in my baby's head. No tears. I watched them sew my sons head shut. No tears. The only one that was crying was me. Robert held him and talked to him, made him laugh, and went for the CT scan with him since I couldn't because of the pregnancy.

The lesson learned? My son is braver than I am.


Little Frankenstein.
The jersey is dark, but the whole shoulder was soaked in blood.

Good thing for the helmet.....umm.....I guess......
And something that no mother should ever admit....I quickly took my brand new awesome jacket off before I scooped up Alex and ran because I didn't want it to get soaked with blood and ruined. (Lord please forgive me)
Papa is coming in to town tomorrow, I know I'm seeing my mother and sister on Saturday.....ever see how mad Italian people get when their babies get hurt? My mother wanted to beat up a 3 year old that scratched Alex's face. This should be a fun weekend.

Letting Go

Have you ever had to let something go, but hate to watch it leave? That's how I feel about my volunteer role at church. With my pregnancy at it's mid-point, my departure from the toddler room is creeping up on me. I know I have to go, but I hate to leave. 2 weeks ago, the director gave me a day off because someone was willing to cover my room. I was happy and sad all wrapped up into one. Irrational thought-Is she trying to get rid of me? Rational thought-I was the one that said I needed to step down for a while, she's just trying to be helpful until a replacement is found. ffeeww.....

I know I need the break, especially lifting babies on to changing tables, and carrying sad babies around, but I still feel sad/guilty/abandoning/quiting/ crazy-probably pregnancy emotions. I know a few ladies that stepped down from their volunteer roles. I wonder if they felt the same way.

You really get honored as a volunteer leader as well. I think I will miss that the most. I'm grateful for the 2 years I have had the privilege to serve as a leader in the children's ministry.

Now I need someone to tell me that it's okay that I'm taking a break. Please. Thanks.

The Ugly Jar

Philippians 2:14 says "Do everything without complaining or arguing"

This message was written by the apostle Paul, who at this time, was in prison, awaiting possible execution. Talk about a positive attitude.

PF has challenged us as a church to participate in a 7 day fast. Nope. Not a fast from food. A fast from complaining and arguing. We were provided with these "ugly jars" that were painted by our children to bring home with us, and each time we complain or argue, we are to put one dollar in the jar. The jars are to be returned next week, and the money will be donated to one of our outreach partners.

I was put to the ultimate test tonight, as I drove home with my husband, who decided we would listen to the Panthers game on an AM, fuzzy, unclear, Gilligan's Island type radio station all the way home.......FROM GREENSBORO. What a prime situation to complain and argue. I made it home successfully, however, our jar already has several dollars in it from both me and Robert, and an I-O-U from Amber in it that will come out of her allowance.

You don't realize how much you complain until your held accountable for it. It's kind of sad actually. I am going to at least aim to have the least dollars in there in this house. We will see.

Psalm 37:4-Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.

What Marriage Means to me.

Me and Colly have been married for a whole 6 months now. Its been quite a journey for me so far and its about to get even more interesting with another new family member on the way. Colly asked me to be her guest blogger and I said sure even though I really didn't want to. ( File that under the sacrifice and devotion section of marriage. ) Not that good at this whole blogging thing but I love my wife so if it's important to her for me to blog then I blog. Come to think about it...There's not much I don't do when she asks me to do it, whatever It may be. ( Note: Might take 2 hours to 2 days to get it done but it gets done. ) So here it goes. ( Note: Colly asked me to blog 2 days ago.)

What I've learned!

I thought a Honey Dew was a type of fruit that grew on a vine like a watermelon.................Nope, sorry guys. Turns out a Honey Dew is really a Honey Do and its a list that grows on a piece of paper and it keeps growing year around no matter how many times you harvest. Imagine that.

I've learned that there's more to breakfast and dinner than cereal and turkey sandwiches........I've also learned how to eat at the dinning room table instead of eating over the kitchen sink. ( Note: Saved me from cleaning the kitchen table. )

No more drinking out of the container. ( Note: Again, saves me from washing a glass out. )( Note 2: Nana will kill me! )

I've learned how to gain weight gracefully. (Note: My wife being pregnant is no excuse.)

All joking aside. Its not just me anymore. I've been given a gift from God to be a husband and a father. To lead my family in the best way I know how and in a way that would make God and my wife proud. I had to let go of those things that I held onto as a child for I am a child no more, I am a man and God has called me to be more than what I was before I was married. I said my vows and made a promise before God to love my wife from now until forever, in sickness and in health till death do us part and that's what I'll do.

I've been blessed with a wonderful, understanding, patient, loving wife and 3 1/2 awesome kids. ( Note: That half will soon make 4. ) It's been 6 months since we said our vows but it feels like it was yesterday. I've only known Colleen for 2 yrs but I feel like I've known her my whole life. We have a very loving marriage and I couldn't ask for anything more.

Marriage

I'm not married very long, but have learned a lot about marriage thus far. With plenty still to learn, I am excited for the future. I've learned a lot about marriage as an outsider, being that I am surrounded by many happily married, seasoned couples, but it's different when you experience it for yourself.

I've learned that:

Even a single mother can be selfish in her routine with her and her kids. It's no longer just us, and I call all the shots. That's not a bad thing, it's a good thing, but an adjustment just the same.

If I didn't have God in my life, and the desire to be a Godly wife and live a life that pleases Him, I probably wouldn't be half the wife I am.

Even if something is not important to me, if it's important to my husband, it's important to me.

I have to let my husband make decisions for our family, even if I don't necessarily agree, and stand by him and allow him to learn through his success, or his failure.

I have to love my spouse for who his is, not what he does for me.

There is no 'keeping score' in marriage.

Caring for my husband is a privilege, not a job.

I need to communicate my needs humbly, as needs, not as demanding 'expectations'.

Part of being a good wife is taking pride in taking care of our home, our children, and my husband, even when I'm too tired or I 'just don't feel like it'.

When I have my moments where my thoughts aren't exactly 'Christ centered', I just think about my wedding vows, and the calling God has placed on me. He's given me the opportunity to be a wife, something I had kind of given up on. I don't want to disrespect that ever.

My next post will be written by my husband, and his views on marriage thus far. Should be interesting!

Manners

I don't care what year it is, I am going to make sure my son has proper manners. I already use the phrase 'ladies first' as often as possible. I'm trying to teach him to hold doors and let the ladies go first too. A little manners go a long way.

2 times this week I ate at work standing up while men sat in the available chairs, and not one of them offered me their seat. I'm sorry, but pregnant or not, if your a man, and your sitting down, and there is a woman standing up with no seat, GET UP. Offer at the very least. Who doesn't teach their boys these things? Won't they want this for their daughters one day if they have any?

My husband has these manners. If I come in the door with bags, he runs over to grab them out of my hands, and then goes and gets the rest. He opens doors, car doors, he was brought up with old school manners. THANK GOD FOR THAT.

I'm done.